To Taste it Twice

Hello, Blogland!

I've been lurking for quite some time (haven't we all?), and I reserved the name for this blog a while ago, based on one of my favorite songs. I loaded up my reading queue with all my favorite blogs and planned to begin writing soon. But then, for several weeks, my poor empty little blog sat lonely. I've just been too chicken to start actually writing the thing. Mostly because I had no idea how or where to start.



And then Stormy posted a lovely blog entry about writing and I knew it was time to start. Mostly because of this quote:



That really touched me, because I really don't want to let this time fly by me. I want to remember the first week of my marriage. I want to remember our first nights in our new place. Our first bike ride in our new town. Our first days at our new schools. I don't want to forget any of this. So, I guess it's time to start writing, like it or not!



I'm Johnnie. I'm a 20-something post-graduate student somewhere in the northern half of the US. I am very newly wed to a fellow 20-something post graduate student, who has a name but would prefer to keep it to himself.

We've been trying DD in one form or another for over a year now. Sometimes we are very serious and dedicated and consistent (and one of us is very sore). Other times, things get a little off course and he spanks me for silly things and ignores most of my bad behavior. Other times, things go completely off the rails and we end up have long conversations for days on end to get things back where we want them. It's a work in progress, but all things considered, DD has been very, very good for us.

Okay wait, before we go any further here, I need to be very clear about what DD is about for me. Starting with this:

 

I am a raging feminist. I get angry on the regular about things like equal pay and birth control access. I have some serious career ambitions. I yell back at cat-callers; I move my own furniture when I can; I rarely shave my armpits. I also yell "SPIDER SAFETY" at the first sight of arachnids and wait for my husband to take care of the situation. I wear make up and a lot of dresses. I do shave my legs. For me, feminism is about making my own choices--and I choose the passenger seat in my marriage. I copilot. I make my opinions known, but I don't grab the wheel, unless he asks me to. I choose to cede some control, to take a supporting role, and yes, to occasionally (frequently) be tossed over his lap and spanked silly.

Neither of us believe that this dynamic is right for everyone, or that it is divinely or biologically or otherwise ordained, or that it is at all necessary for a healthy and functioning relationship. We both just like it. It works, for us. It works the way that we do it. For us, it's not about the difference between men and women--it's about the difference between me and him. And the difference between me and him, is that I like to feel taken care of, and he likes to feel in control. I really hate reading about how DD works because women are like (insert some stereotype here). DD works because the people who do it like their roles in it, for their own reasons. Personally, I feel very safe and happy when my Maintenance Man has been keeping up with me. And he feels very safe and happy when I am submitting to him.

Ok. I feel better now.



A bit more background: We've lived together for a while, finishing up degrees. After moving across the country together for school earlier this summer, we made it official and married each other last Sunday. It was so beautiful and touching, and we are both definitely still over the moon. That is NOT to say, however, that there haven't been any spankings.


Somehow, despite his very sweet and affectionate honeymoon love for me, he still finds it in himself to paddle my behind for the slightest offenses! For instance, just the other day, he was politely, with only minimal tickling, trying to squeeze by me to get into our very small bathroom, and I INADVERTENTLY squirted him in the face with my contact solution. A small struggle ensued.



And the next thing I know, I'm getting hauled headfirst over his knee! I actually still thought, at this point, that we were just playing around a bit... but apparently his dominant sensibilities were affronted at my insubordination, and this was a serious issue of respect, and something... I don't know, I think I stopped listening at that point in order to wail more properly.






Well, it hurt. Though not as much as the new paddle he purchased in a GIFT SHOP on our way home from our HONEYMOON. But that, my friends, is a story for another time.

Until then, may your evenings be quiet and your rumps unroasted.

Jonnie :)